Life after Mom… it must go on!

It’s been an entire month now since I said ‘goodbye’ to my sweet mommy. I never pictured my life without her. Now I find myself stumbling, somewhat gracefully, through my life; a bit scattered, extremely emotional, kind of dazed, super determined to make big changes… I don’t really know what I’m doing, or how I’m doing it, so for now, I’ll just tell you what I do know. 

On April 7th, 2016, Mom was blindsided with a stage 4 pancreatic cancer diagnosis. By the time the doctors discovered it, made up their minds as to what kind of cancer it actually was, and were prepared to offer a course of treatment, it was too late. We got to spend 3 full months together, crying, laughing, cooking, praying, and saying the things that needed to be said. I only got to have her for 3 months and 1 day after that life altering phone call. 

It’s really easy to be angry with the doctors she saw, especially those before the diagnosis. She was “sick” for about 6 months before, with no discernable illness, and certainly no major indicators of cancer. I’ve definitely lost some faith in the ability of the medical “professionals” in our area. 

It’s difficult to be alone, and hear a song, or see a photograph that reminds me of her. I always smile at first, but then the flood gates open. I got my eclectic taste in music from her!

It’s difficult to not be able to pick up the phone and call her whenever I want. We talked on the phone almost every day. She was the only person I called on a regular basis. When she started texting a few years ago, we wound up “talking” every day. 

It’s painful to think that she didn’t get to meet her first grandchild, who was born a mere twenty-two days after she left us, but comforting to know that she is up there in heaven, and got to see it all from the best seat in the house. 

I’m so grateful that we got to celebrate her 54th birthday with her just a few weeks before things got bad. It makes my heart happy that she and Dad got to go away for a few days for their 32nd wedding anniversary just days before she became confined to her bed.

I am eternally grateful to the hospice staff! They were wonderful at answering all of our questions, even over the holiday weekend. It was incredibly comforting to hear them say that we were doing a great job in keeping Mom medicated, comfortable and clean. The compassion they showed my family through every step of the longest week of our lives was just immeasurable.

It’s comforting to know that there are so many people out there whose lives were touched by my mommy. I seriously don’t think I’ve ever met a single person who didn’t have something nice to say about her. I love hearing stories from her friends. My heart beats a little faster and a smile spreads across my face when I see pictures of their adventures together. Mom was only 54, but she lived an incredibly full life. 

I have to keep reminding myself that she’s in a better place, free of pain, cancer free, and celebrating with all our loved ones who beat her there. I will forever cherish the time we got to spend together in her last couple months. I’m blessed beyond words to have been able to call her my mommy, she chose me to be her daughter, and it was just an added bonus to call her my best friend.

So yes, it’s difficult to answer the, “How are you doing?” inquiries every day. “I’m doin…” That’s my typical response, but what I mean is, I’m sad. My heart hurts. I miss my mommy. While I appreciate that people care and that they’re taking the time to check on me, honestly, I don’t really know HOW I’m doing. By the grace of God, I’m alive, back to my routine, and still able to laugh and smile, so I guess I’m doing alright.

Keep singing and dancing with the angels, Mommy. I’ll see you again someday! 

The American Dream in 2015…

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What happened to the American Dream? It changed! (Sort of)

How many stories have you heard from your ancestors that started with, “I came to this country with fifty dollars in my pocket…”

Their dream was to be a part of something that would provide a better life for their families. They came in search of opportunity.

Sounds pretty simple and realistic, right? Isn’t that what we all want?

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I believe that the American Dream has become one of self-employment.
Most of us want to:
*Stay home with the kids
*Travel whenever we want
*Tell the boss “not today”
*Call the beach/pool/golf course “the office”
*Take time off for the holidays (as long as we want)
*Truly love what we do
*Feel like what we’re doing for a living is actually making an impact

The direct sales industry is making the dream a reality for thousands of people every day!

People often assume that direct sales means get rich quick, which is possible, if you have the time, energy, and enough existing capital.

Most of us who sign a direct sales agreement DON’T have a lot of time, energy, or money, but we do it anyway, in hopes of making it to the big time. We look for companies with a ground floor opportunity, or a proven track record of success.

I chose Damsel in Defense because of the product line, the ground floor opportunity, and most of all, the mission. While our mission is what keeps me going every day, this post is mainly about the money. Every time I hear someone say, “it’s not about the money…” I shake my head and think, it’s ALWAYS about the money! If it wasn’t, this wouldn’t be a business!

Did you know that 25,000 people sign a direct sales agreement every day!? -from my notes with keynote speaker and author, Mary Christensen .

It’s been nearly 2 years since I signed my agreement. I definitely haven’t gotten rich quick, but I am able to maintain my car payment with the extra income. I was so certain I would’ve been able to quit my day job by this point in my newly chosen career.

BUT, when it comes down to it, I’m lazy. You really only get out what you put in. When you’re your own boss, you have to be a little harder on yourself, and hold yourself accountable.

Thanks to Damsel’s unbelievable training portal and weekly training calls, and the incredible support system I have by my side, I am learning to get out of my own way. It’s not rocket science, but it does take practice and consistency to build a successful business. I’m still working on it, and loving every minute of it!

For now, I will continue building MY American Dream, while working for the man (as my brother calls it) and doing my best to help other women discover the wonderful opportunity that I’ve found in Damsel in Defense.

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Right now my goal is to earn this killer trip to Riviera Maya, Mexico, in May! I have until December 31st to earn it, so I guess it’s time to really step up my game, and step out of my comfort zone!

If you would like to know more about our mission, let’s talk! If you want to know more about the compensation plan, let’s talk! Find me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter. I’d love to share this adventure with you!
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